Thursday, March 16, 2006

Fighting the bull, one memo at a time

Having worked in large corporations for over 10 years, I have learned to accept the bull---- phrases that are rife in most memos. After all that 'return on investment', 'synergistic' and 'best practice' verbage -- it is sometimes hard to get any real meaning out of anything.

But wait, now there is a tool -- the Bullfighter

Here is what the Consumerist says:
Dear Corporate Executives — please learn how to write. Having initially been a greasy, protoplasmic ooze poured into the mold of a stiff, starched suit, then imbued — Golem-like — with the spark of meaningless corporate business speak, you soulless automatons never seem to realize how meaningless phrases like "maximize initiatives" and "establish paradigm, COB" are to those of us who sprang forth from human loins.

Inhuman though you may be, your only means of expressing yourselves being Powerpoint presentations and the occasional "Booyeah!", we don't really expect you to figure out how to relate to an actual person by yourselves. But luckily, Bullfighter is here to help you with the task.

Bullfighter is a plug-in for Microsoft Office that operates like a spell checker. But instead of scanning your documents for typos and spelling mistakes, it scans your documents for corporate bullshit and suggests more human alternatives appropriately. ...
Fight the Bull: Bullfighter (Thanks, Lifehacker!)

Okay, now I just need to find a way to sneak this onto computers of the HR department.


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